Sunday 30 June 2013

Monsters University

This movie was good. Great even. Which is partially the reason why I figure I better wrote a review of it. That and I deleted, by accident, my Superman review and so I figure another should take it's place. To preface my lists and short elaborations, a little back story. When I saw the first Monsters Inc. movie I was quite young and had to leave the theater because of how scared I had become. Then my dad started calling me 'shmoopsiepoo' or however that's spelled. Ever since, it's been the family film of ours. As much as we love Les Miserables, and regardless that my siblings all know the words to every song of Rocky Horror, that is our family movie. OH OH OH DID I MENTION SPOILERS

I cried a little. 


Now, on with the show! Let's make a list of the best parts, which was to be honest, most of the movie. 
Baby Mike Wazowski. Cuter than a button and such a sad but straight to the point childhood dream. Not to spoil much, but he goes and shit occurs and he decides he's gonna be a scarer. 
•I want to go to that university. Way back last year, they had an advertisement for the university itself. If they have an English program I would totally be in. Plus, in the actual movie, it was so cool. I'm pretty sure that when Sully spills that red cup, the contents weren't water though. Not cool. 
•The fact it touches on legacy. So, Sully happens to be the son of a really popular scarer, one that was super good. But, gasp, Sully isn't like his dad at all! Everyone expects the best of him, and he doesn't feel he can deliver. It also helps him learn that he can study too. 
The way some of the characters are from the original.This might be a touch spoiler-y, but the yellow people come back to help with a human child crisis. One of them says that they will always be watching Mike and Sully. Well I was cracking right up. It was hilarious. 
•That nearly direct lead up to the original film. Enough said. 
•IT WAS BEAUTIFUL, MAN. Not just the actual movie itself, but the little short before it called 'The Blue Umbrella' was equally gorgeous. Pixar is my friend. Pixar is my childhood. HEIL PIXAR!
•That ending. Sully rigs the games, it turns out, and that's why they won. But he fesses up to it, and en they get expelled from the university. Sully and Mike don't go back to the uni though. They go get jobs at Monsters Incorporated, as mail workers, and move their way up. I guess this ties in with the direct lead to the original film, but this is my blog post and not the readers. Yet. 

Maybe there might be something wrong with this movie; 
•We already know how it ends. So almost any and all moments meant to make us worry are kind of wasted. 
•Needs more David Tennant. 

Why can't he be in family friendly, not heart breaking movies that may or may not be animated by Disney? He was in Pirates as a voice....but I think a sequel to Beauty and the Beast with this man would be sufficient. Or Bennedict Cumberbatch. 


To do a quick, pointless summary I will rate it on both an Imdb scale (1-10) and a Rotten Tomatoes scale (0.5-5), as I will rate them. 
Imdb- 9/10
Rotten Tomatoes- 4.5/5

Best character, hands down. 


Batman

A thought- Catfish have mustaches. Not whiskers. Though isn't that a synonym for mustache?

I MUSTACHE YOU A QUESTION BUT I'LL SHAVE IT FOR LATER. HAHAHAHAOH GOSH THAT IS HILARIOUS. 

Thursday 27 June 2013

Theory no. 3

When I was a baby, mom used to watch a lot of VH1, namely anything really that had 80's music. Among the many wasted nap times I thought I didn't need, my mother would do laundry and watch one hit wonders or something similar. This is different from my grandmother, recently dead, who would let me watch Star Trek with her. That was always fun. I'd play dolls while Data and some other person did intergalactic alien crap and blah blah Star Wars rocks. 

So as a result, most of my childhood is geekery and the 80's music scene. Not to mention some 90's and early 2000's. Since I was young, I was impressionable. So I have a theory in which that music is embedded into my mind and the choice to listen to it is subconscious. 

My mom wanted a wine snob child who would be sociable and listen to her kind of music. She has me, 1/6th the reason she drinks, growing into my geekery, tea snob and not very social. My mother doesn't know how lucky she is though that I'm not a stereotypical teenager though. I don't drink, or party, and I'm very much so literate. 

To sum up: I'm going to have 'Like A Prayer' stuck in my head the rest of the day. 

I wonder when my Wonder Woman comics are coming in. 

Batman

A thought- What the sweet blue batchrist is Tubthumping about?

Sunday 23 June 2013

Armpit Fudge

There is this dessert one can make at camp called armpit fudge. It is really good, when made correctly. Yes, you can make it in your armpit. Yes, I have done that. At SOAR. We were discussing this dessert and it's possible variations one night over supper at camp, when my guider brought up a life changing subject; armpit fudge can be made anywhere warm, like armpits and the groin area. Now, this is a girl guide camp, and I already accidentally said 'fuck' a little too loudly. Almost immediately a thought popped into my head, a thought that required me to put down my fork and cover my mouth. 

This thought was 'Now I understand why it's armpit fudge instead of vagina fudge.'

Vagina fudge. Oh boy is that hilarious. 



Penis fudge doesn't sound as funny. Boys have cooties though. 

Here's a picture of my cat to make you feel better. 

Batman 

A thought- How many women have contemplated marrying Kevin Bacon for the last name of Bacon?

Thursday 20 June 2013

The Great Gatsby

Another Batman post? Yes. Also, if you are not familiar with Gatsby, spoilers are approaching. Take this as you will. 

Another movie review!

I'm going to pretend someone will read this. Another movie review, in the loosest term possible. So to make this as quick and humorous as I can, let's make more lists! 

Issues I personally had with this movie:
- Toby Maguire was not in the right role. Everyone else was superbly cast, except Nick. He just didn't play a confused, easily persuaded alcoholic. I could've played Nick. Why didn't they cast me? I can do a pretty killer Nolanverse Batman voice. All manly and crap. 
- The backgrounds were so blatantly animated sometimes. At least they were pretty. 

The best parts, in my opinion, of the movie:
- That soundtrack, and it's uses, were amazing. Especially when Myrtle is killed, the use of 'love is blindess' is beautiful. I had chills. 
- the 3D made the movie look more polished, look a lot more grandiose. 
- Leonardo DiCaprio. Must I elaborate? Because I'm not going to. 
- The last lines, how they were typed out on the screen and totally just wow. 

All in all, a good book and movie. 8/10. 



Batman 

A thought- In this movie, Nick is played as totally gay for Gatsby. Gatsby also has a giant car. Overcompensating for something, Jay?

Emotional Dump part 3!

Let's carry on where we left of last time. The Doctor had lost his beloved companion and the world was crying. At least those who cared where. Except those who didn't like Rose, they probably were out consuming nutrients and kicking puppies. My tears had dried the next night afterward and so I started with the new companion. 

Some say Martha was a horrible companion, and while I was watching that season I didn't like her either. But that was when my wound was fresh, and now I understand Martha. She had fallen in love with the Doctor, constantly pointing out that he was like fire, and if you got too close he'd burn you. The Doctor was too busy ignoring Martha to angst over the loss of Rose, or so I believe. Theories, anyone? That season's finale was with the master, where Martha nearly got killed but the Doctor was also nearly killed, and the master. He was a good villain, and thank batchrist he wasn't into daleks. But he was into drums. I will elaborate on that later. Maybe. Martha leaves the Doctor after that experience. I don't blame her, those three episodes were terrifying. 



When everything cleared up, the Doctor got the sassiest, loudest, very fabulous Donna. She was great, oh boy was she. Until the first finale. The daleks (?) we're messing everything up, and so everyone had to come together to save the day. The everybody includes the following;

Sarah Jane
K9 
Sarah Jane's kid
Captain motherfreaking Jack Harkness
Some Torchwood friends (Owen and Gwen?)
Mickey
Jackie
Pete
Martha
Donna
Rose

That's right. Rose was there. She doesn't reunite with the Doctor until he nearly dies, and regenerates into himself. Jackie kisses him a lot, and something shocking happens. Donna is trapped inside the TARDIS, and something happens, and the Doctor's hand cloned a new Doctor. Two doctors, and Doctor Donna. That's all you need to know. Those who watch the show know what I mean. That's all that matters right now. Rose has to choose between the two doctors, and chooses the clone because she has to. The real Doctor doesn't get to say he loves her though, in fact he asks her if it needs to be said. 

For the record, the guy in the blue suit is the duplicate. In the first half that Rose is the Rose possessed by Cassandra, aka bitchy trampoline. 

She did get a happy ending. Just not the right one. 


He also has to brainwash Donna because she has the mind of a time lord and therefore the awesome will make her explode/die. Not cool. 

(Anything about Donna not remembering. The one maybe about recognizing 11)

The second finale is the most gripping, saddening thing I think I've ever seen. Our loved Doctor joins forces with Donna's grandpa (?) and saves the day. But what happens is the bad guy and the master are bringing back the time lords to fuck shit up. Not cool. Skipping to the end, skipping to the end.... The Doctor kills the time lords, gets pumped full of radiation to save Donna's grandpa, and proceeds to regenerate. In his final moments, he says goodbye to Mickey and Martha, who got married, gives Jack a boyfriend (of course), gives Donna the winning lotto ticket at her wedding, and goes back to 2005, just to see Rose before she met the Doctor. He then goes back into his TARDIS, an ood was singing, and suddenly Matt Smith. 

Yeah, also innapropirate. Because that isn't possible. 


Wow, were on our third emotional train wreck of a series of blogs that describe the crap that goes on in Doctor Who. I'll try to not be so long winded next time. (That's a lie.) 


Batman 

A thought- http://the-iou-apple.tumblr.com/video_file/53254192996/tumblr_llhg4tf3GZ1qidf2q 


Emotional Dump part 2!

This section will most likely be the longest, and I will get very emotional. It'll be similar to post traumatic stress disorder or syndrome. But I will be okay. Also, this is being written in a clinic waiting room while I waste time. I hand out at my dads work when I have to waste time. Best daughter ever. And best big sister, so stop trying to take my spot. SPOILERS. 

The Tenth Doctor

Let's start with the first season, and why that was so not okay. Let's pretend to limit this. Really, David Tennant had at least three seasons, because he had three companions. So maybe three paragraphs? No promises though, but lots of pictures. It opens with the Doctor and Rose FINALLY going on a date. Kind of. They fight aliens in a hospital, and things happen the rest of the season that really strengthens the belief that the Doctor loves Rose, and Rose loves the Doctor. Not just for his hair, or how he looks in those ridiculously dorky glasses. Nope. Not at all. There's an instance in which he is about to fall down a pit to confront satan, and he says; 



There are to other episodes I'd like to touch on before we move onto the finale. One had to do with televisions eating faces off, and Rose's face accidentally gets sucked into a tele. When the Doctor finds out, he is absolutely livid. The intensity of his care and concern and passion for Rose is ginormous. It's amazing. I had chills. The second time is when Rose saves the Doctor by doing what she thinks will work. It's absolutely beautiful. He gets out, lights the Olympic torch, but she can't find him at the street party. Suddenly, the Doctor shows and he's all giddy about edible ball bearings. Then everything went straight to hell. 

Doomsday started out with Rose Tyler talking about how that is the story of how she died. I was stupid then, and kept watching, although scared. What if she did really die? How? Is the Doctor okay? Did she did from his love being too big and it made her heart explode, but now she's a time lady? (I was very naive then. I'm not now.) Daleks and Cybermen come to mess up the world,and then the parallel universe gets involved. If they had stayed out of it, everything might not have happened. Instead, Mickey, Jackie, Pete, and all the people come, except Jack, to fight cybermen. In the second part of it, the part that broke my heart, the Doctor figured out that there was a dimension he could put all the bad guys. Rose decides that she's going to always travel with the Doctor, and gives up ever seeing her mother again. Then, as they are closing the portal that ate up all the things that have traveled through time (they were holding onto things that wouldn't let them get sucked up.), Rose lost grip. Good thing her dad came back to take her to the parallel universe, but she was gone. No way to get through that wall. 

Innapropirate, I know. 


Then, he sends her to Bad Wolf Bay, where they have their last conversation. He burns up a sun for her, just so say good bye. Rose is crying, the Doctor isn't crying but is in emotional pain, and the watcher is bawling and yelling at the screen. The call finishes before the Doctor can finish his statement, the one we all wanted to hear. 

"Rose Tyler, I-" and he's back in the TARDIS alone, and cries. 



This is longer than I expected. But they loved each other! And she was gone and that was no cool and that just argh what is air this upsets me. It upset me. My boyfriend at the time was a 'whovian' and encouraged me watching the show. Except he wasn't there for me when I needed him. Way too immersed in his bullshit to even have the decency to give me a hug the next day because I was emotionally disturbed. He laughed at me. LAUGHED AT ME. My pain isn't funny. 

The worst part was he didn't ship Rose and 10. Leaky Anus. 

Something to alleviate the pain. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

Batman

A thought- How do you properly wear a scarf?

Clinic music

I feel like I'm in the dry part of some romantic comedy drama flick. Or a movie in the Twilight series. I've been sitting in the waiting room of the clinic from 8:40am -12:30am and then again right now, from 2:20pm- anywhere between 3:30pm and 5:00pm. If you are unsure what this means, it's code for I've been here too damn long. But the worst part isn't the waiting here for my dad to get off work, nor is it the uncomfortable chairs, or the fact the patients waiting are always staring at me. (Purple hair isn't that weird. It isn't.) The worst part is the music that they're playing. 

It is probably enjoyable music for some, but to me it's freaking horrendous. It's instrumental pieces that seem fitting for either a dramatic scene in a western, or a coffee bar. It's songs that have no reason to exist, other than to just be played in certain places, like this one. Sometimes it's some mellow, smooth song that has someone singing over the tune with words about love or some shit like that. Actually, I stand corrected. Some are orchestral pieces like 'Jupiter' from that planets concert thing. But it's still boring. Robin plays that clarinet solo better. RIGHT ROBIN?

In other words, I feel like I'm intruding on the love and social lives of the elderly who talk about peeing in cups. Plus it got too warm in this damn room for me to wear my sweater and freakishly long scarf so I can be the mysterious purple haired crazy woman in the waiting room who doesn't do anything but read and type. 

To sum this mess up- holy batman on a unicycle light on fire riding through a pile of feces this is boring. At least it isn't the visitors room in the hospital. Urgh I've spent precious hours of my life there, hours I'm never going to get back. 

Right now I wouldn't mind a little friendly company. Or hateful company. 

UPDATE: I got to go home at 3:15pm because my mommy loves me. 

I feel for you, Javert. Things look bleak. But I won't jump off a bridge while singing. 

Batman

A thought- Why can't waiting rooms play trashy pop music, or something I could at least dance REALLY embarrassing to?







Monday 17 June 2013

Emotional Dump part 1

I watch Doctor Who. I've written two incredibly odd fan-fictions, one with licking and one with an asexual doctor. But when I was watching it, I was dating an anus with not enough skills to even care for a dead fish. So naturally, I have a lot of pent up rage/joy/confusion over the last five or six years I've watched. Plus it's easier to tell my current boyfriend if I write it in blog post. Texts are just so hard. So what am I going to touch on? Anything I can remember, though mostly to flesh out how most relationships in Doctor Who end badly. Or just way too sad, so sad that you lose sleep. But let's start this trip down the rabbit hole. 

The Ninth Doctor

One season. One mother freaking season. You know what it did in that season? It managed to introduce a ton if important characters, and make me cry (though that's not hard). Mickey loved Rose, and Rose was kind of indifferent when she ran away with the Doctor. Then as the Doctor fell in love with Rose, she decided she liked Captain motherfreaking Jack Harkness. 



The singular Doctor Who character who is so... flamboyant? Maybe what I'm trying to say is if he tried to make love to a Dalek, he would totally make that Dalek melt. Speaking of daleks... They used to be so cute! I wanted to cuddle all of them, but then they managed to scare the holy hell out of me. Then they made Rose angry. 

(That's the wrong doctor though. Oops.)

(Spoilers for Nine are coming. Brace yourself.) 

So they ended up on the game station. Jack gets stripped naked and Nine is totally freaking out. Then Rose gets separated and they save her eventually. I don't member all the episode, but I remember the end. Rose swallows the TARDIS and Nine kisses her to take it himself. Of course, she manages to bring a whole bunch of people, most importantly Jack, back from the dead. All is well. Except Nine goes up in lights and suddenly David Tennant. This is also known as regernation. But Nine and Rose loved each other! Oh, and Mickey is ignored, for the most part. 

After watching that last episode I cried. Couldn't watch another one until the night after. I was a mess. A calm, sobbing mess. That's when I went on Pinterest and pinned away my sorrows. Little did I know it would get worse 

Look at David Tennant's hair. Look at that hair. It's ridiculous. 

Batman

A thought- Why does necrophelia exist? If you don't know what that is, google it. 

Sunday 16 June 2013

GIANT ROBOTS VS. GIGANTIC ALIENS

Disclaimer; I will be very light on spoilers. Since I think that this is one of the greatest things to ever exist, things will not be discussed to heavily. I want you, the reader, to watch the socks off this movie. 

PACIFIC RIM

As I have already pointed out, it is a good film. Actually, a great one. It might not be the proper cup of tea for those who are not fond of sci-fi, a simple plot idea, adorable puppy eyes, and the awesome concept of rock 'em sock 'em robots, but replace a robot with an even bigger alien. 




Awesome bits.
-The robots and the aliens. I know that this is a big topic, well essentially the whole film, but whatever. The Jaegers (robots) and the Kaiju (aliens) are glorious. Combine them, and geeky ovaries everywhere exploded. Even the manly ones. 
-Charlie Day. He's so freaking cute! Seriously, though. 
-The fact that they had Owen from Torchwood. Well actually, they had two different lab rats, one of which was played by the same guy who did Owen. I nearly lost my shit in the theater. The other guy kind of looks like J. J. Abrams, but plays a kind of crazy scientist who is a Kaiju junkie. Not to spoil too much, but they get into mischief. Also, the other scientist is Charlie Day, if that gives you an idea. Freaking hilarious stuff though. 
-They're all casual feminists. They have female Jaeger pilots, and they don't throw giant fits about equality or any of that. It's just more of a 'you're qualified, you're in the job' situation. As long as the minds are compatible (not explaining. Spoilers!) things can occur that are awesome. Like the next thing on the list. 
-Those fight scenes. Holy shit. They were so beautiful I want to wear them as my wedding dress. Beautiful in the sense that while things were getting gross, the animation or cgi or whatever was so magnificent. The film has such a wide scope, and everything looks so legitimate. I totally believed for two hours and a bit of my life that we had giant robots like that. 
-I GOT THE THOR 2 TRAILER AND THERE WAS LOKI LIKE YOU GUYS. 


Not AS awesome bits.
-No monkeys in diapers. None. 
-Such a predictable plot. But the twist was great. But so predictable. 

Well, look at that. A whole post. Now I'm going to watch the 2009 Star Trek and embrace a world full of geek. Plus Spock. 

Yeah, I went there. That's a legitimate picture that I took. 

Batman

A thought- Was Caeser a spicy guy? 

Friday 7 June 2013

You Slut!

Can so even though Batman and I are nerds we often talk about sluts and we have come to the conclusion that Batman is half a slut and I robin is only 3/4 of a slut. You may ask yourself how do nerds become sluts....... That or how in the world do u get half a slut and or 3/4 of a slut. Well the way we determine how sluty we are is by the slutiness scale also know as how bare your forehead I so thanks to the fact I have side bangs I am only 3/4 of a slut. So how sluty are you.

Thought for the idiots of the world 
Next time u go to judge someone on how sluty they are make sure to look at there forehead first 

Robin 

Robin vs Dr who

So Batman has challenged me to write a post on how doctor who has influenced my life. I can honestly say that exept for Batman talking about it which can get really funny. Ask one of my friends a let her go on a rant about doctor who now they both hate eachother....... Something about her being really anoying and him not caring about doctor who or anything. Other then that it really hasn't affected me............. Actually I lied I now think about what I had for breakfast because I normally tune out of Batman rant half way threw (sorry Batman) 

Thought for the idiots of the world
Next time u want to do something cheesy get someone get a bag of cheezies and say this was the cheesiest thing I could find 

Robin

Wednesday 5 June 2013

British Men

I've come to the conclusion that British actors like to wear drag. Observe. 

Christopher Eccleston 

John Simm

Benedict Cumberbatch

John Barrowman (includes one of him not in drag for comparison)

Matt Smith

And finally, David Tennant. 

Damn those legs. 

Batman 

A thought- What if the hokey pokey is what it's all about?